Friday, December 30, 2011
"Good Bye Letter to a Precious Friend"
Good Evening to All,
Tonight is a somber night for me. I am at a loss for words. I truly don't know what to say. How do you say good bye to a special and very close friend? My friend, my confidant, my sister in Christ, Neita, "went home" to Jesus last night at 10:00 pm. As a lot of you know, I have spoken about her in "prayer needs" for quite some time now. It is so hard for me. We "fit" together like "mutt and Jeff", peanut butter and jelly, or spaghetti and garlic bread.
We were like the "two musketeers". We did so much together. I catch myself wanting to call her and realize it's not possible. It won't be her voice on the other end of the line. I have told so many others that the feeling of loss does not get better, we just learn to "cope with it" better. I tell them this from my memories of the loss of my parents (mother specifically). I hope I can keep reminding myself of this in the days to come. It's been a long time since I have had to deal with a "personal loss" so I had forgotten the initial "sting" of death. ( I know the Bible says "O death where is thou sting", but I'm not referring to that. I am referring to the initial shock, disappointment, anger, and hurt we feel when we first hear about it. That to me is the "sting".
Neita had debilitating health issues for the last four years. It started with a tumor on her pancreas and ended up being hospitalized for almost 6 months because of complications. She finally was able to come home and seem to get steadily better, but was constantly having problems with diabetes. Which eventually lead to a stroke. She started recovering from the stroke, but soon went into a diabetic coma. She did wake up, but then had a heart attack (from what I could gather.) After that she went into respiratory failure.
It has just been one battle after the other for her. I prayed and prayed for her healing. I sincerely believe, no, I KNOW that God does heal because I have seen Him do it. The thing is, sometimes He heals us while we are still on this earth as He did for her several times, or He decides He wants to heal us when He brings us "home".
I have a choice to make. I can choose to be angry and upset with God for taking
this precious woman who meant so much to me away, or I can rejoice "IN MY sPIRIT that she met her final goal which was to make it to heaven to be with our Savior, which is what we should all strive for.
By the way, the lower case "s" was not a typo. I did that because to capitalize it would be using God's personification, because He is the Spirit and we have spirits.
Anyway, although I feel like I have cried myself out of tears, because I will miss her physical presence, her sweet voice giving me advice or "chastising me for a negative attitude" (which I need from time to time, 'the chastisement not negativity), and her fun spirit, I must remind myself that I should be happy for her in the sense that she has made it to where I long to be eventually.
I know I will see her again, and I wonder if we will be able to talk about "old times". Neita, I hope that there are Lots of Turtles in Heaven for you to collect.
Wherever you are up there in heaven, I hope that we will be meeting again.
Remember dearest friend, I love you.
I know I don't have to tell you this because being the precious Woman of God that you are, I know you will "rest in peace".
Lots of love and fond memories,